"Playground Love" Air
sighed looking out the window, distracted by the clouds crossing the sky blue. The pencil between his lips, the voice of the teacher in the background. Distracted, his mind which inevitably brought me back to her hazel eyes. Jack, always the same. Did not hear any more after the concert, except to say he was studying and it was busy. I had heard a hint of his fredezza voice that made me shudder. How to caress a piece of ice. I could only think of his face and I missed, I missed him terribly.
I went to class without even a note on my block, as I was distracted labored to remain attentive to the words of the professor, and walked to the cafeteria on campus.
I ordered a coffee at the counter. Was turning the spoon in the cup listening to the ticking of the metal to ceramics, a girl at my side when he bought a bus ticket.
do not know what snapped in my head, a sudden flash, the desire to run, run away, no matter where, but away from there. From everything and everyone.
"A ticket for me too." I cried after paying the coffee. So straight off, without thinking about a goal. Without
renderme account I found myself on a bus in case the first one that inspired me.
I sat by the window and watched the landscape that presented itself to me before. More moved away from the city appeared near the hills, meadows and trees.
As I changed in so little time? How could Jack change me this way? As if I had stripped of armor and I had left defenseless and exposed to all dangers. That was how I felt, if the first was a strong girl, sure of himself, who did not hesitate to play with the sentiments of the people ... Believed invincible, and instead ... Only un'effemira illusion. In reality I was nothing but fragile. He was in love enough for jotting down my whole house of cards, my beliefs.
Meanwhile, his head pressed to the window, watching the landscape now so green. The light of the sun touched the hills producing surreal lighting effects and unique and I thought of what had passed since the last time I had stopped to look around, to savor the little things around me. I was so taken by my many thoughts to myself forgot everything, even the contact with the true reality.
After much, I do not remember what, the bus stopped his run to copolinea: a town forgotten by God. I went down and I
penetrated in the old little village from medieval features still.
Straits villages that were the booming sound of my footsteps on the stone, I entered my head, bombed. No one around, just me in a lonely place. Only an elderly
she walked past me and smiled. The long skirt with red flowers on a black background, a handkerchief tied on his head to keep the collected hair and a sweet smile and surprising to those who had seen too many things, but he never lost the will to live. She held her arms an empty wicker basket, who knows what she needed, perhaps to reap the rewards of his work in the garden. He seemed happy that a foreigner had crept in there. I felt my heart beating, as if it had been building up to that point, I was alive and who knows how far from home. I had completely lost the perception of the distance.
walked again until they arrived in a meadow. I sat there. The cold air cut my face until they got used to the temperature.
I took my clipboard and began to draw everything that comes into my head. Broken hearts. Swollen eyes. Dancers without limbs. Do sad. Rabbits that I wanted to paint pink. Mira. Awards. Shoot. I wrote these words in repetition. MiraPremiSpara. Jack, is aimed at me, press the trigger; Shoot me. I wrote: Nonsense. The word of the day. The hills in front of me. The tears on my face. The mist before my eyes. I threw myself I was back and the grass behind. I closed my eyes. The Wind that I plan Whisperer. I listened to him. Hands clasped dancing and playing piano. Sweet melody, and far more nuanced. The small voice intonai a melody. Maybe heard it somewhere, maybe just invented on the spot.
Suddenly closed eyes I felt the darkness coming down. I raised my seat and I noticed that the sun was Tramondo. I had no idea when the last race for the Capus went away so I ran to the bus stop at breakneck speed and with my great relief the last bus had yet to start.
conizione lost all the time, did not even know what time it had when I came back to campus.
When I was almost in front of my dorm I saw a shadow nearby.
I recognized him immediately: he was Jack's shoulders.
smiled to his vision, believing that he was waiting for me. Perhaps he had changed his mind, maybe she wanted to hug me again. Kiss me. Touch me. Send me to heaven.
When I got closer I saw that he was not alone. I caught a female figure before him. They were close, closer. They kissed. They embraced. It is whispering to things with a smile.
That figure of a woman was not me though. I was estranged from my body and I watched. I was not in his arms. It was another, I did not care who he was.
My blood froze in my veins. I could not believe what I had just seen. Lei him there before my eyes. Ran away hoping not to see me.
I walked into the dorm quickly and still incredulous shock.
soon as I felt sad but in the wrist, I turned suddenly. It was him.
"Lu ..."
I looked at him without saying a word. I checked her tears, but still slipped from my face, wetting her cheeks. "Leave me alone." Divincolai arm, did not want to be touched by him.
"You've seen it all, right? I'm sorry ... I ... "
building in front of the stairs, waiting for me to strap the heart from the chest and threw him to the ground.
"Do you mind? And for what? Treated as a stranger to me for weeks? By showing up with another catch in front of my dorm? What? Do you ever regret anything, but continues with impunity to do the shit! "I raised my voice volume, while the rising anger and disappointment skyrocketing.
"I ... I can explain ... "feeble confused words like fiery darts stuck in his chest.
"Oh really?" I smiled bitterly trying to stop the tears. "If I were a more sadistic you'd better shoot some shit, but since you want to avoid a figure of shit you can also go. That's the goal. "Stretched out his arm towards the door behind him, with outstretched arm to keep it tremble.
"I know, but ..."
"Ma .. what? "I interrupted, not wanting to hear his voice" There is still something to say at this point? "I mordicchiai lower lip nervously, my eyes fixed on him who did not want unrivet from him that I loved with all of me and now was destroying me, but ... I had just completely destroyed.
"I did not want ... I tried ... I tried to have a serious story with you, but I can not. To build something more. I did not want to hurt you. "
" This is really beautiful ... If you had not wanted to hurt me you should let go from the beginning! You should not have fool me! "I screamed between uncontrolled tears by now, because every single syllable uttered from his lips was a stab to the heart, soul, brain.
"I would have told you ..."
"Tell me what? What do you need a demonstration?! You could do me a small drawing, no? "
" Tell you I'm not ready for this thing. It made me understand many things stay with you ... I ... "
I was not interested to know what he understood, I felt humiliated, used ... The last of the idiots.
"It 's been an interesting experiment, right?! I hope you will also be fun, Jack! Now get out of here ... Go on ... "I turned and ran away away, up the stairs.
"Lu ... Wait ... "reached out to me.
I stopped halfway down the stairs. I looked at it again with an expression unreadable, too many moods in me to be all shiny and clear.
"You could at least have the decency to not be kissing in front of my house with another. You're stupid, Jack ..." were the last words I said before resuming the race.
I stopped and stood there looking at me.
ran off at our rehearsal room. I opened the door violently and then close it without looking anything altrettando strong in front of me and inciapai, slamming one knee.
cursed through her tears, but after he heard nothing: I was overwhelmed by something much stronger. I wanted to pierce the chest. I wanted to destroy everything around me, the whole room. But I was there in a corner of the room, crying, cursing that I was in love with the wrong person.
I had given him all of myself, the reality was simply that had never cared about him. I was just a guinea pig for his experiments. I was a toy. A stupid doll that was now broken and had no right to remain in the cage in the games. I passed in front of pictures of him and embraced kissed her. The string. The whisper in his ear. My head was bursting. I slumped to the ground with his head in his hands. Nothing mattered. I had won my heart, I had placed in his hands and he had closed, in a tight fist shattered his heart.
It opened the door quietly letting a chink of light.
sprint gaze. Elvira I looked at the door. She bit her lip. I was sure he had heard and seen all the painful scene. He walked slowly and without a word took up my guitar.
Despite being a bass player, had learned a few chords on the guitar. The minimum for a passionate music as you. If he drew .. Began to sing for me The House Of The Rising Sun was not out of tune as he said, far from it: his voice of an angel. Perhaps it was the moment, but it seemed to me the sweetest voice I ever heard: husky, sensual, but clean and clear. She did not care to be out of tune or make a mistake, he continued. I penetrated into the cracks of the heart. Slowly, as sap. He sang to me. He sang for spare pride that I had lost. He sang for my tears. He sang to my heart. For my brain. For the evil that was inside. Out perfectly intact, destroyed inside. Burning with rage. Helpless with pain.
"-Tell me when to say I love you without fail, tell me who to entrust the soul without being killed. I never want to fall in love. Never again." I thought. While the face was still covered with tears.
I could have died at that moment and I do not have cared nothing. If it were not for you that night ... He sang for me again. When finished put the guitar and I stroked his cheek.
"I will always care for you, as you took care of me. When we will not be dancing together for you under the temporal pissed. I will sing for you whenever you're sad. I promise that I will do everything to bring back your face serene. "
I gently stroked her forehead and smiled at me, not hiding a vein of concern in the expression in her face so perfect.
I could not even to speak, still crying, but I could only say "Thank you ... Of heart. "In a faint voice as she returned his embrace, and hold her.
Two girls. Two friends. Two sisters. Two souls that were encountered and had been climbing each other like ivy. Two flowers that had torn the petals in the same room, kept each other the life nailed to the ground.
Dedicated to M.
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